Ceramics - Fisherfly

To continue the concept of the Birdog I made, and shown in a previous post...I am doing a series of animals which I call Morphimals (morphed animals) this semester in my Ceramic sculpture class. This may not be a new term (Morphimals) and I know this concept has been done before, but I'm creating my own ideas with clay.

The first, which will be put through the Raku firing/glazing process is what I call a FISHERFLY. A fish and butterfly combined. Due to the large wings and their weight, I created notches on the body to fit the wings like a puzzle and will be securely attached as the last step to completion.

The photos below are before it's been fired or glazed. The wire I used for antennas are special for this use and can be fired with the piece.


The hole at the rear of the body is to fit a rod for mounting it...emerging mid-flight from a mount on a wall.

Rose Cluster necklace

For my niece's high school graduation, I made her a necklace using extra roses I had cast in Sterling Silver from my wax sculptures used in my previous class project (cuff bracelet). I clustered the different roses for a pendant on a thin chain and added a clasp. I then applied patina for color.

Metalsmithing - Raising & Forming

I took a course in Metalsmithing - Raising & Forming over the summer. I dealt with larger and thicker sheets of metal than in my Metal Arts/Jewelry class. It took a lot of physical strength, a few blisters, and a LOT of noise, to create these pieces with hammers and large torches from flat sheets of metal.

Flower Bowl

The first project was taking a flat square of thick copper and creating a raised bowl. Then we could do whatever we wanted with the bowl. I decided to give it a unique floral look, then used heat patina over it.

Pod Pens

The second assignment was to create hollow pod shapes from flat copper sheets. I made the first one into a pen after giving it texture applying a heat peanut oil patina and rubbing it back. The pen insert can be replaced when it runs out of ink.

I created a vine look with the second copper larger and longer one. It's more of a velvety grey in person, but looks green in the photo. It can be made into a pen also.

Copper Deco Dish

For the third project, we created our own wooden die and used it to hammer the shape to a thick copper sheet. I used an oval cut out in the wood and transformed the copper sheet's shape, also adding texture and drain holes (in case used as a soap dish or planter). I wanted to give in an organic, somewhat art deco or old-fashioned look.

Kinetic Abstract Floral Necklace

For the final, we had to use techniques we learned and apply them to our own design. I made a sculptural copper pendant using the bowl and hollow pod methods. I had to create a small bowl from a flat sheet first and also the small pod. I used brass tubing on the back to hang it from the leather cord necklace. The pod moves and dangles, so also creates sound.

Short story (fiction)

Here is the fictional short story I wrote for my English Composition class (Narrative Storytelling) in Summer '08. The instructor commented that I had the highest marks in the class! Wow! Not too bad for someone who is not a writer or English major!

Final Draft

8/5/08

Red Button

“We just thought you should know that we think you have the qualifications needed, but decided to go with someone else. And to be quite honest, we weren’t so impressed with what you wore to the interview. This position has to do with the company’s image since greeting clients is a big detail, and sorry to say, but…the first impression you gave us on appearance wasn’t great.” The woman’s voice got perkier, “But we wish you the best and thought we should let you know for the future, so you don’t make the same mistake at other interviews.” Holding my breath, I said, “Okay. Thanks.” and clicked the red button on my cell phone, plopped on my couch, and exhaled while dropping my phone on the floor.

My arms dangled through my open legs while I leaned forward in disappointment and shock. From the sun rays shooting through the crooked blinds, I stared for a minute at the particles of dust drifting about like glitter in slow motion. I could smell the dust, but couldn’t feel my body for a moment as the embarrassment and shame hit my brain cells like an explosion. Too still to even shed a tear, hunger started to weave through my body as if eating would be my medicine.

Slowly moving to the kitchen, I opened the heavy freezer door and the chill felt great in our hot, dirty, and dry apartment. I took out my favorite chilled and icy Ben & Jerry’s ice cream and set it down on the beige Formica counter on top of various crumbs, glass rim stains, and junk mail still sitting there from a month or so ago. As I got a spoon from a drawer, I noticed my hangnails as if they were magnified a hundred times. Back on the stained cloth couch I switched to lie on my side, and could feel my tummy cellulite flopping down. I flipped on the dust covered TV and stayed there, while eating my Chunky Monkey ice cream and felt a bit soothed by the taste of chilled bananas. I didn’t want to think about it all.

I heard large footsteps, the screen door open, and keys clanking in front of our L.A. city apartment. Jeremy was rough with the door as usual, slammed it behind him and puffed his way passed me, “Hey.” Throwing his jacket over a wooden chair in his path, he didn’t even look at me on his way to the bedroom. He came out and went straight towards the fridge for a beer. Plopping his six-foot-two self on the worn recliner, he gazed at the TV, “Anything yet?” Under my breath, “Nope.” As usual, he avoided looking at me while his eyes were fixed on something else. We sat in silence as the Entertainment show host talked about the daily gossip in celebrities’ lives. I liked to get fixated on those shows and was drawn in as a fantasy world. I guess those women represented something I’d never have, so only lived vicariously through them.

Jeremy peered at the empty ice cream container and gave me a look of disappointment. My stomach felt ill from his laser beam brown eyes. I could smell his perspiration from where I was. “Karen, I can’t keep on buyin’ you these groceries and stuff if you’re not going to work!” His black long sleeve shirt covered the tears in his blue jeans. I rebutted, “But I’m trying really hard. You know that I am.” Rolling his eyes, “Yeah, whatever. Just get one. SOON.” The recliner swiveled and rocked out of control as he walked to the kitchen, crushed can in hand, and chucked it into the garbage. The commercials were over, so looked back at the TV to watch news on my favorite actress, while I heard the bathroom door slam. I sat up, pushed myself off the couch and threw away the carton evidence.

I peered out the front window and wiped the sweat off my forehead as the sun was setting. My mind was going too fast with negative thoughts, so my eyes got teary. The light from the street and fading sun were peering in the blinds, showed up as bars across my brown t-shirt. The sun set in an orange glow from the massive smog beyond the neighboring worn and dated seventies apartment building rooftops. Somehow, the silhouettes of poles, phone lines, and birds made it an oddly pretty picture.

My cell phone rang. I stumbled for it and realized it was on the floor. “Hi Honey,” my mom said. She liked to call a lot, hoping we’d get closer. “Hey.” I was reluctant to tell her that her advice for business attire was not in good fashion sense. “Yeah, I’m okay,” after she questioned my tone. Not in the mood to continue and talk, I got off the phone, “I have to go. Jeremy is calling me.” I pressed the red button.

I caught myself looking directly in the small hallway mirror on the plain Eggshell White painted wall, as I brushed by the recliner. I stopped and stared at my face, in my eyes. ‘What am I doing? What am I thinking? Where am I going? How is this all happening? Why am I here? Do I really exist? Must I stay here in this miserable place? This misery? Am I loved? Do I love? What do I want? What do I really, really, really want? Do I even like who I am? How could I let myself get this way? Who am I?’ It was all too much to take. I just wanted to sleep.

I crawled into bed, where Jeremy was curled up on his side towards the wall. My mind was going on and on, so couldn’t sleep. I could have used some comforting and so put my arm around his soft hairless bare upper body and scooted in to spoon and cuddle. He just laid there without any response, but I didn’t care. His warm body satisfied my loneliness.

In the middle of the night, he got up to use the bathroom and woke me up by moving my arm and abruptly wobbling the bed, so in a barely awake scratchy voice I said, “Hey, stop it. You woke me up.” In a brash tone he said, “I don’t give a shit at this point. Look at you anyhow. No job, no life, no goals, and…fat. You weren’t like this three years ago. You’re always whining. You’re looking to me for EVERYTHING. I can’t do it for both of us. I’ve seriously had it. I can’t even stand your body against mine right now. I’m sleeping on the couch.” He grabbed his pillow and a blanket and left the room. Too tired, and figuring it may be a dream, I crashed back to sleep.

The gardeners were extra loud in the morning. Their blowers and gas machines were blaring and high pitched, while I could hear rapid shouting in Spanish. Another thing I couldn’t comprehend. Little ticky-tacky noises were coming off the window as particles of weeds, pebbles, and grass were hitting it. I sat up to slam the window all the way and inhaled a bit of the gas fumes they left seconds ago. The drapes were glowing as the sun was coming up outside. I heard Jeremy’s footsteps on the wood floors in the living room as he shuffled to get ready for work. I stumbled out of bed, still wearing the t-shirt and sweats from last night, and headed to the bathroom. I said “Hi” to him and smiled as much as possible for being this tired. With a sarcastic frown, he said, “You don’t even remember. Think about it.” He turned and left the apartment, slamming the screen door behind him.

Trying to snap out of my slumber, I wiped the steam from the vanity mirror, rubbed my eyes, and looked at my face. The puffy bags and lines around my eyes and dripping mascara stains running vertically down my face reminded me. I sat on the toilet and began to cry in my dry, chunky, hands, and tasted my salty tears. Peering through my fingers, my belly bounced as I cried hard and loud and took deep breaths. I was sorry about myself. ‘Where will I go? What will I do? Who can I turn to?’ I had a flashback about being a lonely child, wanting to curl up and cry on my bed.

I impulsively stood up to get my cell phone and dialed my mom’s number. It was 8:36AM, but thought she might be up. Still choked up with a wet face, I stumbled, “Mom, Hi.” She could hear it in my voice and waited for me to continue, “Jeremy doesn’t want to be with me anymore. I don’t have a job. I’m fat and pathetic. How did I get like this?” In a soothing and sad voice, she said, “Honey, listen to me. You ARE NOT pathetic. Everything else will be handled fine. It’s all going to be okay. I’m coming over. You stay right there.” I sniffed the glob of mucus coming out my nose and said, “Okay. Thanks. I love you.” With a voice of strength, she replied, “And I love YOU. See you shortly.” I pressed the red button.

I rested on the bed waiting for her. I felt warm inside knowing I was loved, not entirely alone, and that she was coming to support me. About thirty minutes later, I answered the door for my mom to come in and we hugged. She grabbed my face and said, “Look at me. You are beautiful, smart, kind, and have just had some slip-ups. Everyone does. You’ll get through this fine.” She sat me down at the small round wooden table and prepared us breakfast with the last eggs and bread remaining. She told me to take a shower and get refreshed in the meantime. We ate at the table, freshly cleaned off by her, and drank water from the tap – since there wasn’t any juice or coffee. “Sweetheart, it’s time you take control of your life again. I don’t know what happened to you when you met this boy, Jeremy, but he took a hold of you and I couldn’t step in since you didn’t ever listen. The time has come for you to regain your strength. We…you and I, are going to get you out of this place and improve your life. You will come and stay with me until you get back on your feet again. We can join a fitness plan together…and…”

Somehow, some way, I snapped out of my relationship coma and interrupted, “Wait! Slow down. This is all too much too fast.” Sigh, “I need to figure this out on my own. I’m an adult.” She looked puzzled to hear that coming from my mouth, but somehow a little entitlement came over me. I said “Wait…,” and picked up my cell phone to call Jeremy. Knowing it was me, he answered, “What? I’m at work.” I said confidently and semi-sarcastically, “Yes. I know you’re at work. Just want to let you know that I’m leaving you and this filthy apartment. You can keep the kitchen stuff and furniture, but I’m taking the electronics.” Abruptly and loudly, he said, “No you ar….” Click. I hit the red button.

My mom looked at me proudly, with a surprised smirk on her face. Her eyes were sparkling and she was looking the best she ever had. She’d lost 100 pounds and had been keeping healthy. I needed to stick by her and let go of my pride to think I could do it all on my own. I said happily, “Let’s do this!” We scrambled to pack my things and left before he returned from work. I kept my key copies just in case I forgot something or had to pick up mail. And to think…I held the keys the whole time, yet didn’t use them to lock the door behind me. I didn’t know how all of this came over me and how it all happened so fast. I really felt like I woke up from a long slumber. The screen door slammed behind me and the sun was shining with a blue sky. Leaving, I was still fat and unemployed, but I felt refreshed and good. I knew my answers would come. I needed to find me first.

We arrived at mom’s floral scented suburban, quiet home and unloaded. I stored most of my things in her garage. It felt wonderful to be in a tidy, clean, and orderly environment. Not a streak on the windows or mirrors. Not a stain on the carpet or furniture. She kept runners on the carpet, a spotless kitchen and tile floors, with immaculate décor. I remembered when she used to be a lot sloppier, but with the body transformation, her environment improved also. I gave her a huge long hug and thanked her with my eyes and tender smile. She kissed my cheek and said, “You’re on to new beginnings. Now that you will listen, I can help you.” I nodded my head in humbleness. Exhausted, I took a nap in the guest room before dinner.

My cell phone woke me up. I stumbled, with my smashed face and saliva on the pillow, looked through my bleached blonde wavy hair and saw it was Jeremy. My mom yelled from down the hall, “If it’s him, don’t answer it.” I did anyhow since it’s so automatic for me to. He said, “What’s going on? Where are you?” I could hear in his voice that he was mad and confused, though sad and trying to hold back. Keeping my composure and with my mom peeking in and making me stronger, I said, “I’m done. I’m moving on. And from what you said last night, you know it’s best for both of us.” He replied, “Fine.” I said “Goodbye!” and pressed the red button slowly. I glanced at my mom and she smiled and nodded in agreement, arms crossed and standing firmly. I was trembling a bit, but relieved at the same time. I knew it was the right thing to do. I thought, ‘Why didn’t I do this sooner?’

Mom made the best home cooked meal I’ve tasted since I could remember. I could smell my favorites from down the hall…chicken and vegetable stir-fry in a wok, salad with lots of fresh vegetables and crispy croutons, with brown rice. I went into the kitchen and gave her a big hug. I savored the cozy feeling. She smelled like sweet perfume and her dark brown layered long hair was felt by my hands as I rubbed her back in thanks. Until dinner was ready, I walked on her treadmill in front of the television and watched cable channels I hadn’t explored before. The walking worked up a sweat quickly. But I wanted to stay determined to get healthy any way I could and to figure out where to go with my life and what to do.

Dinner was great and we decided to take a walk outside in the warm beautiful summer night, with twinkling stars and shining full moon. I could smell the jasmine, trees and blossoming plants we passed by. I told her that I would plan on pounding the pavement slowly, but surely, for my life. I would find the right job, go to school, get healthy, and concentrate on ME. She nodded in agreement and put her arm around me. Right then, I realized that it actually can be true… ‘Mom knows best!’

My cell phone rang, so I pulled it out of my jacket pocket. I could see that it was him again. I just pressed the red button and smiled.

Breaking Free (Jewelry series) & Spring Show '08

To explain my jewelry series concept...

“Breaking Free”

From personal experience, as well as a subject that most people can associate with, this is a jewelry project (my first) based on the concept of “Breaking Free.” For symbols, I used the common objects: lock and key, ball & chain, and jail/prison. These are to represent freedom on many levels. Such as letting loose of the past - personal or generational; starting on a new and improved life; spiritually being set free; awakening to a new self; and other deep meanings associated with freedom and the symbols of being held down in the past.

For this conceptual project, I wanted to create work that says something about me or my interests, which would have a strong message. This subject matter is inspirational, which I hope to achieve through strong and bold pieces that will convey strength, power, and to overcome…which will can be worn together as a unit, using mixed media.

There are 5 necklaces of different lengths, which can be worn separately or mixed/matched and worn together. Each of the individual necklaces are named, as they fall into sequence from the top layer to the bottom, 1. “Escape” (having a magnet & antique key), 2. “Jail” (having bars), 3. “Ball ‘n Chain” (having abstract balls and chains), 4. “Flight” (having an abstract feather-like attachment), and 5. “Time” (with attached weathered chain, lock, and antique key). The earrings are also "Ball 'n Chain," carrying on the same pattern as the necklace of the same name. All the metal was darkened to give an old-fashioned, worn, dark appearance. The photos may not be accurate in color.

This subject is personal and important to me since it was a major and difficult turning point in my life. I was imprisoned by ideas, functions, and a way of life that was not from my heart, yet had the key the entire time (“Capture” bracelet). It was a long and hard time of feeling caged-in my mind and my life (“Jail” necklace), and I had a difficult time of figuring things out as I tried to search, which felt long, hard, and tedious (“Ball ‘n Chain” necklace). This eventually led me to search out art schools and realize my passion for going after it (“Escape” necklace). After visiting the Bay Area I was drawn to it and quickly decided to move here and pursue an art education/career (“Flight” necklace). After starting here, I realized how much creative energy I have stored for all these years past and it’s now time to let it start to flow and discover what’s inside me. Like finding an old treasure chest buried at the bottom of the deep sea (“Time” necklace).

Inspirational images I found:

Top to bottom: Escape, Jail, Ball 'n Chain, Flight, and Time. I made and soldered all of the chain links on Escape, Flight, and Time. I also made hook closures on the 3 shorter necklaces that have them. Each are unique to the style of the necklace. This was my first time doing these things except for one practice bezel, practice hollow forms (cylinder and sphere), and practice jump rings (chain links). There were a lot of challenges, mistakes, and changes along the way, but I worked it out as best as I could. The results aren't too shabby though, I must say!

Close up of the necklaces:

Below is a close up of the top/shortest necklace called "Escape". The backside of the magnet bezel (photo below) is of an image I drew, cut out, and rolled onto the metal. It is a cartoon-like break-through or "Pow!", "Bang!" symbol seen in the comics like Batman. This necklace is made of Sterling Silver, a magnet, and antique key. I handmade/soldered the chain links and the hook closure as well.
Close up of the magnet sticking to the authentic metal antique key:
Below is a close up of "Ball 'n Chain" necklace. This necklace is made of Sterling Silver, used a thin/delicate chain, created the Ball 'n Chain charms, and the matching hook closure:
There are also little ball 'n chain 'doohickees' on the chain - see below.
You can also see some of the "Jail" necklace in this photo, which is also in the photos further above. I used Sterling Silver tubing, silver beads, and stainless steel cable to create it.:
Close up of the feather like design on "Flight". For this presentation with the other necklaces, I placed the position of the feather to the side. But, since this is a long necklace, there isn't a clasp and it can be worn in any position. If worn alone, it looks great in the center and can be pulled and held with a hook clasp in the back to appear shorter. The rainbow colors are also from the patina. There is a lot of action as the wires move softly and shift the form. On this one also, I created the delicate chain links by hand and soldered them. There were many casualty links that didn't make it, since they melted or got ruined in soldering them. It is very difficult to control and solder such a thin wire and my instructor didn't think it could be done at first. It took a lot of patience.

The longest necklace is "Time". This is a heavier chain than all the others due to the thickness and length. I handmade and soldered the Nickel wire links and created the hollow lock out of copper. The key is an authentic antique key, and actually fits into the hole I cut out in the lock - which I didn't even measure! I tried it later on, and it just happened to fit.
Due to the length of the necklace, there isn't a clasp and can be worn in any position. It can also be worn diagonally across the body, as a belt, or doubled up as a 2-layered necklace. Due to the materials and weight, I like the sound this one makes and the substantial feeling it has.



For the back, I used a decorative metal ring with horseshoe and keyhole charms on a chain (found object) to attach the 3 necklaces containing hook closures. It forms a unique look from the rear with charms hanging down the back. It can also pull the necklaces up on the front, and down further on the back.

I was able to make my first pair of earrings (including the ear wire hooks) to add to the series. I had extra pieces from the Ball 'n Chain necklace, so made earrings along the same lines. They are Sterling Silver, dangle nicely, wear well, and can be worn with any of the necklaces. I will continue to add to the series by adding more earrings, that go along with the designs of the different necklaces.

To continue my series called “Breaking Free” of a 5 layered necklace and matching earrings, I am created a cuff bracelet as a part of the series. I chose to make the design of a “slave” medieval type bracelet, as it is not only a strong piece by it stretching over the hand from the wrist to fingers, but this style is hardly seen today. Also, its statement goes along with my theme.

Medieval looking or chain maile bracelets I’ve seen don’t necessarily have a cuff at the wrist, instead having more chains or a thin bangle. However, I chose a cuff due to its strong appearance (i.e. Wonder Woman, Gladiators), ease of wearing (putting on/taking off), and relating to the theme – because it looks more secure, like cuffs used in ancient times for prisoners (and the powerful appearance of so much solid metal on the skin). The chains over the hand to the finger add to the appearance, as chains are used to hold people, animals, and things down and secured.

The 4 different roses, which I sculpted using wax before casting, adds a few symbolic elements, 1) personalizes it 2) adds femininity, beauty, and hope – since they are in bloom and 3) symbolizes passion and love. The red Garnet gem in the cuff’s bezel is a dark red and almost looks black unless light is reflected to see a glimmer of deep red. It symbolizes the red of the roses, the blood, sweat, and tears I’ve endured, and the passion of my heart. I am calling this piece “Captured.”

Here it is when I was working on it. It is made with Nickel, Sterling Silver, leather cord, found object (real antique key), Fine Silver, Garnet, and Patina for darkening/color.

Close up of the 4 different roses cast in Sterling Silver (sculpted in wax first):
Final cuff bracelet. The leather cord ties underneath the wrist.:

Backside/underneath, where you can see the opening and leather cord stitching:
Close up, showing texture:

The series (5 necklaces, 1 pair earrings, and cuff bracelet) on display for Spring Show judging:
This photo shows how the cuff bracelet fits on the hand and wrist:

Lists of students whose work has been chosen to be in the Spring Show. My name is the second from bottom on the first page. Both things I entered got in (my jewelry series above and my Kuramonkey bronze sculpture). I would have entered a third piece (maximum was 3) of ceramic, but it wasn't ready yet due to kiln conjestion. Anyhow, when I saw my name and both piece #'s, I couldn't believe my eyes, jumped for joy, and had to contain myself! There was so much great talent to be chosen from, that I didn't want to have high hopes of getting in.:

My jewelry on display at the Spring Show 2008:

Metal Arts/Jewelry section of the Spring Show, close to the entrance. In this photo below, mine is the skinny dress from, looking straight ahead - between the plexiglass cube displays.

In the Spring Show photo below, you can see my Kuramonkey sculpture on display (bottom right), among the fine art. I made Kuramonkey in Sculpture 1. The staff would remind the students that Sculpture 1 (beginner) work doesn't get chosen for the show (or is very rare), since there is so much advanced work and limited space. I tried anyhow with Kuramonkey, and it was chosen. That felt great! I noticed that the name tag they made didn't say the class that it was made in.

At the opening reception, I received an award from my department!!! Best Emerging Artist - Spring Show 2008. In the photo below, I'm holding the beautiful bronze trophy (first trophy EVER!) next to my Kuramonkey sculpture. And I also got a "Scholarship" check made out to me, along with the award. When they called my name in front of the big crowd, I was in disbelief and it was an emotional moment for me. One of my teacher's (Patty) handed me the trophy, a hug, and said, "Are you surprised?" I said "Yes!". She said "Everyone likes your work, Tania." A photographer took our photo and I was in shock. I was excited to JUST be chosen for the Spring Show.

My bronze trophy up close:

Hope to get more awards in the future...!